Sunday, July 31, 2011

Kilig-Filled Weekend

I'm just dropping by for a quick post as it's past midnight. Just before the weekend (exactly two days before that) I received two cute surprises. Let the photos tell you what those are.

On Thursday night I found this:

Notice the red rose is the same as the template of this blog. Love it.

And on Friday, there was this sweet stuff hidden on my tumbler which I got to share with some of my office peeps:

While the note was left unnamed, I don't think it's going to be much of a big deal. After all, it happened to me in the past as well if you'd go to this post as well as this one.

Tipsy with happiness as Kristine puts it.

Here I am with my office mate Kristine who took all the photos and captured the "secretly deliriously happy" me while she's among the giddy ones (hahaha!).

Well, talk about happy things. I'd like to think mom was certainly right for saying that sometimes a little inspiration won't hurt. At least for motivation's sake.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Could It Be You

Who caused me to feel these unusual signs

That began from that glance of your lovely eyes

Jerry Maguire may have caught her by hello

But to me, it’s that disarming glance that just did so.

Or could it be that way you pronounce my name

For unlike others, you don’t do the same

Is it the way how you express chivalry?

Wait. Probably, it’s just the way I see.

You don’t make me that deliriously happy

At least not just yet, that I could say

Though you cause me to be tickled pink

Each passing day.

And the pen that has rested for years

Had regained its force

To say these things, though hopefully

It won’t make matters worse.

Could it be you that caused me all these?

Yet, I’m glad I’m still at peace

Maybe it’s because I’m not yet into you

I'd rather wait for things to happen and hope you'd feel the same way too.

Saturday, July 23, 2011

Saturday Night Love Quote

Quoting my office mate and seatmate Neil Garde, who said that this quote aptly would describe me, I am capping my night with these wise words:

"We were given: Two hands to hold. Two legs to walk. Two eyes to see. Two ears to listen. But why only one heart? Because the other was given to someone else. For us to find."

Have a relaxing Saturday night everyone.

More Than Their Princess, I'm The Daughter

Been through a worthy Saturday -- or should I say a week. For the past for days, Papa has been meeting me every morning to pick me from the office and drive me home. And there are times I cannot still believe that he's actually doing it for real; because lately he's been going back and forth to the ancestral residence in Quezon and I only see Papa for a week. Prior to this, he has been away for three weeks.

So it was like sort of bonding time that even if I am in an odd schedule at work, there still is time that I get to spend with Papa -- even if it meant just driving me home half asleep in the car.

And I don't mind waiting for him for like 30 minutes or so to arrive at the office's parking lot (though I feel uneasy waking him at 4:00 am to remind him about it).

But this morning, was different; because he picked me up -- together with Mama.

And I can't be more than any happier at that. Talk about precious mornings and worthwhile days.

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Picking a Conscious Choice

As I post this, I am inside a coffee shop, just like one of the chanarcters in Marla Miniano's novel, Table For Two.

Incidentally, I’m about to celebrate 30 months of being single in less than 24 hours.

30 months. That’s exactly two and a half years.

Lately, I have been receiving a bunch of different comments from people. Not the offending kind but rather the wake-up call type. Months after my best friend from grade school got married, she said I should already be in a new relationship especially since my friends and former batch mates are now either in a relationship, if not hitched to their respective partners. A colleague at work even commented just recently that given my age, I should have started building a family of my own.

And it’s not today that I receive comments like that. I tend to encounter those things daily.

Not about giving in to peer pressure but to be honest, there too are times that I think they are in a way right. There are times I would suddenly think of it and I’d tell myself, this hiatus from not being in a relationship is long (if not too long) enough. A week ago, I remember talking to another best friend over breakfast about my plans. This pause had been that lengthy and even then, there had been moments that I would just tell myself that maybe, I won’t enter a relationship and get married anymore; thinking that I’m not destined for it. I’d say I would just be a spinster for the remaining years of my life and take care of my parents. After all, they are getting older, and anyway, there’s no problem with me being alone.

It also came to a point that I’d think that maybe, I’ll just give in to my former thought of entering the convent. Thing is, my family is against it and I understand where their objection is coming from.

There too were times I would feel that a worthy relationship that would lead to marriage is something I hope to have. I knew that I deserve for that too. And to be honest, lately, it was something that I was praying for. Especially when my best friend told me that she is seeing me get married in the future. She said that I too need to move on after that failed relationship that lasted half a decade. Don’t get me wrong. It’s not that I can’t let go. I am doing perfectly fine with my current status. However, right now, there is one conviction that I fully believe in:

Love is not a feeling. It is a conscious choice.

I know that I could eventually fall for someone in the near future. I am not closing my doors to the possibility. But then, I want to take things one step at a time. Most people take the definition of love based on what they feel. But from my end, I want something realistic and not confined in rose colored glasses of illusions. I want to make a decision based on that conscious choice – that when this person comes, into my life, I would be able to accept him for what he truly is; regardless of his physique, his intellect, even his religious beliefs -- whether he is a Christian, Catholic, Agnostic or Muslim (after all, I might have my own negotiable list but it’s the personality that’s what’s important to me now).

Regardless if he is just the Mr. 80 percent of what I really want.

Some things are worth the wait. It’s another thing that I do believe in. The way I see it, conscious choices entail acceptance. I know that once I get to learn and to accept someone without the need for me to modify his being, I can definitely say that this really is love – because I went to defy some of its oddities yet I still went on to decide to pick the option of creating a wary choice instead of dwelling on feelings alone.

It will make love all more worth the wait -- at least for me.

Monday, July 4, 2011

Decoding a Dream

A few nights ago, I had this seemingly ordinary dream that I suppose I got out of exhaustion. And likewise, it was a dream that I could vividly recall. However, it was one thing that only my office mate Tin knew of. And this is going to be the first time I'll be writing about that, a week after it happened.

In that dream, I found myself in a simple set-up. I was in a simple garden as if fidgety looking and waiting for someone. Out of the blue, someone from behind spoke to me. When I turned my back to know who the person was, I saw J saying these words in front of me:

"O, di ba nag-usap na tayo? We're going out on a date. Pero not in jeans, sneakers and t-shirt. Dapat naka-dress ka."

I find it funny. While he told me not to wear jeans, shirt and sneakers, he was wearing them. The next thing I knew was I saw the two of us walking hand-in-hand in what I knew was a forest park. I knew the place well because I've been to that venue before -- when I was in sixth grade.

It was out of my plan to search for the meaning of that dream. But at one point, I decided to give it a try. And this was what I found:

click to view image or view it here

Now, among the three words mentioned, I would rather focus on the word connection. I will not deny that there could be affection on my part towards J as I've had a huge crush on him even when we first met two years ago. I won't deny that. But rather than the other description, I guess with the word connection is more apt and appropriate. I am connected to him intellect-wise, (or probably with our equal interest for some activities) in some ways. From as simple as enjoying a friendly past time of trivia games to lengthy, interesting conversations that we get to expound, for me it's the best perspective of what that dream meant and how it is in reality.

This Fetish Has to Stop ASAP

Since it has come to my attention that I currently have in my possession 14 pairs of shoes (it's actually 15 since I bought another pair yesterday to wear during business casual Mondays), I am starting to be alarmed by it. While a good pair of shoes is a must given that I need to walk and walk for some meters in and out of the office daily, it had dawned on me that this is in the borderline -- and therefore has to stop.

Although I don't own the most expensive brands, I don't want to be a mimeographed version of Imelda Marcos either. So today I told my mom one thing:

No more shoe shopping effective next payday.