Over the past few days, two articles became noticeable on my Facebook wall due to two common things: famous (Filipino) directors and Kdramas. One earned flak while the other received praise and appreciation. I was not supposed to write this post as this would be in defense of my perception of Kdramas but then I thought what I am about to say might somehow be valid.
Six weeks into the ECQ. I will not deny that while I am not the type who would indulge in binge-watching Korean dramas, these shows are partly doing its share to lessen the boredom that I am feeling with having to stay at home due to the implemented quarantine. I've never really immersed myself in Kdramas. It was only around 2016 when the medical drama Doctors aired on late-night TV that I found myself devoting minutes of my supposed bedtime to watch a creative output from another Asian country.
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| Photo: SBS Twitter page |
I know I've previously mentioned in this post that this has been my favorite Kdrama. But I never thought that next to igniting my interest in medicine and life sciences, this would impart me great lessons on courage. I wouldn't say so, if not for a personal setback that I had to experience two years after. When the show was aired the second time through ABS-CBN's sister channel in 2018, I still went on to watch it. It was also around that time when our family faced the uneventful news that Papa was suffering from cancer.
Despite being told to live each day as normal as I can, I just knew that I am literally racing against time. When you learn that a loved one is suffering from an incurable disease, it's like living with a ticking time bomb every single day. So each one needs to make the most of the time that's left. My ultimate wakeup call came in the form of the Kdrama's episode 11. There was a scene there where Dr. Hong lay on the older Director Hong's chest while saying how happy he was to have him as his father. It made me realize that for the longest time, I was never vocal about such feelings to any of my parents, much more to Papa. I just knew that letting him know how much he was loved was something that should not be kept unsaid. And so, in our private conversation, two weeks after my 34th birthday, in between sobs from hearing his last requests, I took all the courage and strength that I have left and told him everything-- of how much he is loved and how lucky and blessed I have been for he was my father and not anyone else. My words did not come unreciprocated for I likewise received a reply that I'll always carry in my heart until it's time for us to see each other again.
That would be the last lucid conversation I would have with Papa. He turned for the worst in the days that followed and died five weeks later.
It's been a year and four months since he passed away and this is the first (and maybe last) time that I am writing about that moment on this blog. Recalling that moment causes my tear ducts to release the dam of emotions (and yes, I am partly sobbing as I type these things tonight). The void of losing a loved one will indeed remain in the heart forever but for me, the pain was somehow eased because I mustered the courage to do what was needed to be done and let out the most important words that were left unsaid for years.
So, going back to that director and his comment on Kdramas, I can say I have the right to oppose it. For what he claims to be just made out of faux Cinderellas and belofied characters once taught me something that his masterpiece might not be able to teach -- that is meaningful life lessons and courage was one of them.
