A Silver Lining Beneath the Struggle

I have been MIA for almost a month. This was what I realized as soon as I logged in to write this entry. Well, it's due to several reasons, one of which will be told in this (lengthy) post.

At the beginning of the year, next to the hashtags Claiming It, and Law of Attraction, another word that I kept hearing and seeing is "plot twist". Those words seem positive, encouraging even. But in our family's case, I never thought that plot twist will come to us in an unexpected form.

When my brother fell sick just a few days after New Year's Day, we thought it was just the usual cold and flu linked to the "ber" months. COVID-19 was something we didn't consider at first especially when my brother started feeling better two days later after isolating himself within the premises of their unit.

Despite showing signs of improvement, his friend (a doctor who happens to be one of my former schoolmates) advised him to get tested just to be sure. He could have just declined it, however, as he was starting to feel better, it was his wife's turn to start having low-grade fever, cough, and colds. Their two kids followed with the same symptoms.

Just five days into the new year, we received the news that transpired our fears to reality. Upon receiving his results, my brother revealed to me and my mom over video call that he tested positive for COVID-19. 

We were quick to decide in taking their two-year-old daughter while they went into quarantine because aside from the infant, only my mom and I were on the safe side and weren't showing symptoms. In an instant, there was just confusion, worry, and fear running altogether inside my head. Having experienced the same emotions months ago when my last surviving uncle contracted and eventually succumbed to complications due to COVID-19, it was rehashed by the reality that while three of us were spared, the unseen enemy just victimized four people living next door.

I cannot say that the now-shortened quarantine period was a good thing either. I may have been able to maintain a bit of my candid side, joking once in a while that we seem to be an OFW family with all the every hour video calls, but dealing with COVID-19 inflicted me with a certain level of psychological stress. To some, ten days were just that. But to me, it was one of the longest ten days of my life as an adult. For within those 10 days, I was battling the fear of what might happen next -- the fear that my mom and I will be the next to get infected.

But I guess Divine Providence knew things best. That we will stay symptom-free because there was another tiny human being we have to look after, and a family right next door who will be calling to us for help in attending to their needs while they recuperate. 

This ordeal allowed me to experience how long and weird 10 days in isolation was like. We would not see each other during that period. Essential items will be left by their doorstep, and the only way for them to know it's there is either through a knock on the door, or when we say so via video call. I rarely order food online, but I did so out of whim during their second day in quarantine just to relieve the boredom felt by the kids. While I feel grateful to the delivery guy of our favorite fast-food chain for his effort (and for giving me my first calendar for 2022), I can't help but feel apologetic too because given the situation, and despite that I was okay, I couldn't even stay outside for long. 

But a struggle doesn't come without a discovery. This ordeal might be difficult but it just validated the truth that quality time and acts of service are indeed my love languages. Blame it on the fact that age made me appreciate chores like grocery shopping and feel delighted doing so, but I also realized doing something like running errands for someone else left me feeling fulfilled and happy (aside from having the idea that I can probably start a personal grocery shopper business!)

I was able to watch what life was like from the eyes of a child. In the ten days that I spent with my niece, I got to know what "childlike faith" truly was. Despite this difficult situation, you can still relax and chill because eventually, things will be all right. It was also a blessing that family and friends were there, and served as my support system when I first told them the news. Having someone available for a quick chat just when I needed someone to either vent out something or just to ward off the negative thoughts in my head. And having friends in the medical profession likewise helped us significantly in dealing with and managing the situation within the confines of home.

It may have been a difficult ten days but we were able to get through it. Everything at home is now back from how it was then, and my brother and his family recovered well with the help of family, friends, and by God's grace. While this is one of the frightening periods I've experienced, I decided to leave a space for that here because I know that eventually, when things start to improve again for the better, I will come across this post. This will serve as a reminder of that one difficult point, and that I was able to hurdle past it. 

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