I didn't immediately realize that I am writing this proof of life post almost two months late. A lot has been happening lately on the home front and my day-to-day whereabouts that I have been busy almost daily. But just like the candid line that I've heard a long time ago (and once told a colleague),

"better late than pregnant never!"

Anyway, I am glad (and kinda proud) to say that I officially turned 40 almost two weeks ago. Lately, there still are days when I couldn't even believe that I've already reached this age. When I turned 18, I wondered if I will still be alive to see myself reach the age of 30. And just days after I finally hit the big 3-0, the next thing I thought of was how life's going to be like for me at 40.

And a decade later, I finally arrived to that part.

While 40 is a considered as a milestone to celebrate, I did mine in just a rather quiet and simple fashion. Nothing grand. There were no gifts to mark another era either -- well, except for that beautiful bouquet of pink gerberas that was sent by someone who prefers to remain anonymous. It was just a dinner party with my family (which was even more memorable because my late dad's last two surviving siblings, wo I refer to as the Canadian Aunties are in the country!) and the people that mattered and has been with me for years. 

In between the happy conversations, I was silently trying to recall what life brought me in my 30s to bring me to where I am now.  From beginning that era with the offer to be a guest speaker to a younger batch of graduating students, passing one of the most difficult exams in the country, pondering about life and loss, and taking that courageous step to give things another try, I must admit that it was a good one. It may not be all about celebrations, but the last 10 years was a good mix of struggles, triumphs, grief, lessons, and meaningful experiences. 

As I blew the candles on my birthday cake weeks ago, my friend Jonathan said that my birthday wish this year appears to be that significant dahil ang tagal ko daw hipan ang kandila! But to be honest, in the last three years that I celebrated my birthday, I really did not have any particular wish in mind. Maybe, it's part of the process of getting old. You learn to be content and fine with things, trust the process, and let life surprise you. Anyway, the Lord already knew the desires of my heart. After all, it has always been among the things that I've been praying for. But as of now, I intend to use this new chapter to begin new adventures, collect core memories, and hopefully, live a life of meaning and purpose.